The Phone Call

The only knitting content in this post is that I had to frog an almost completed sleeve because I forgot which size sweater I was making for Dan and, of course, I chose the wrong size.  Why didn't I get up and count the stitches on the body to make sure?  Probably because I was too damn lazy.

Those of you that have been married for a while will know what I mean when I say that I knew something was up the second Dan called and spoke on the phone yesterday. 

Dan:  Hey...

Me:  What?  What is it?  What's going on?

And those of you that are military spouses know that hesitation in his voice can only mean one thing.... deployment.

We were told yesterday that we are being involuntarily extended here in Germany for a year.  We won't be going back to the States until Summer 07 instead of Summer 06.  The reason?  Dan is leaving for a one-year tour to Afghanistan in February. 

We're okay about it.  As okay as you can be. He got back from his last tour in Afghanistan (eight months that time) almost exactly two years ago, so we knew it was coming.  We just didn't think it'd happen until we got back to the States. 

The good thing is I have a lot of good friends staying here that will support the boys and I while Dan's gone.  I know this community so it's much better that it happened here than right after we got to NY where I know only a couple of people.  On top of that, if he'd gone from the States, he'd have gone to Iraq.  I'd far rather have him in Afghanistan than Iraq.  We are trying to find all the silver linings in this.  This is the life we chose so we can't complain.  That's not to say I won't have my weak moments and bawl like a baby.  I broke down this morning when we were talking about it and I'm sure there'll be a lot more tears come January.  We'll get through it, we always do.  It's buck-up time.  Besides missing Dan for a year (he will get 2 week R&R about 1/2 way through), the only bad point is that it keeps me from my grandparents in NH another year.  Two years is a long time for that.  The boys and I will fly home next summer to spend at least a month in NH.

They promised that we will still get Ft. Drum the following year.  I'm not counting on that one but it's nice to know they'll try.

Comments

[Janine]

I'm sorry to hear your news. A friend of ours has a son in Iraq with the British Army and had my son gone into the RAF as originally planned he would have probably have been there too. Thank god he changed his mind about his career - I know that sounds selfish. I admire your positive attitude and will be thinking of you.

[janet]

That's a huge disappointment Jean. I know how much you were looking forward to going back to the States in 2006. And it is really tough too to be apart. But you've managed before so I'm sure you'll manage very well this time.

[nilda]

oh f*#k. sounds like you need a trip or 2 to Brittany chica. Saw German plates here today ... the way is clear....let's go do some yarn therapy. Just got a long list of stores in the provincial capital....the kids can play nerdy goofy games together...

[Nanette]

Jean,I'm sorry to hear what you're going through. I know I certainly am not strong enough to deal with what you're going through. You and your family are in my thoughts.

[Donna]

I don't know how you military families do it. I don't think that I have the strength for it myself. You and your family are definitely in my thoughts. Please give your husband a big hug and a great big thank you. And to you, my new friend, lots of hugs and love and a thank you to you as well. I truly admire you and yours.

[Becca]

this post is hard for me to read. I have a son in the Air Force who is beginning the final part of training ... recently married ... and his wife and I know that this post is their future. Honestly, I am so thankful and proud of all of you in the military ... but my heart aches over the long separations you have to endure. Your strength and resolve is unbelievably admirable. thank you ....

[lillium]

Please tell us how to support you and Dan. Of course you are in my prayers.

[Mary-Heather]

Oh, I'm so sorry to hear (read?) that- I'm really impressed at your resolve and positive attitude, and so glad that you know there is a good support system in place for you and your boys while Dan is gone. I'll certainly include you all in my prayers!

[caroline]

So sorry, Jean. War sucks. May we all live to see the day when all armed forces are in a defensive status only.

[Susan]

Well, Jean, I'm looking forward to your coming to New Hampshire in 2006, and in a way I'm sure you're going to be looking forward to that, too, because it will be that much closer to the time that Dan is back with you. Is Jeremy returning while Dan is gone? I sure hope that he will. I know this is a difficult time for you, but you've got a huge amount of virtual support, so if you are up to blogging, please keep us informed about what is going on with all of you. We do care, and we do worry.

[greta]

Let us know (for those of us who don't experience military life on a day to day basis) what EXACTLY is most appreciatd in a deployment care package. Reading this post I realized how much you *SOUND* like me, always with the silver lining, the knowing that there IS a Blessing. ALWAYS. Hugs, sweetie. You are ALL in my prayers.

[bets]

Oh Jean--- I just read this with tears in my eyes because I know how hard it is to get on the plane, and how hard it is to put someone on a plane. Put that "at attention" steel rod down your spine, and be a brave little toaster. When you feel like it wants to kick you in the teeth, think of all the people you know WITH their spouses who are having trouble--cheating, lying, divorce, trouble with kids, etc. Both of you are doing what you are doing for the good of the Flores monarchy. Damn, you guys are a good pair, and good for each other. I will be happy to make Dan a deployment box San Antonio style. Hugs- Bets

[Pat]

Damn! That really sucks! But you can do it! You'll have some bad days and that's when you splurge on some really really nice yarn! Dan, you and your boys will be in my thoughts and prayers.

[Terby]

Best wishes to you and your family. Wish I could offer more than a virtual hug.

[cathy]

click your heels three times and turn around...did it work? sorry. blessings on the whole family...and to your extended ones as well..may the time pass quickly and find you safely back in the states soon. thanks dan for the job you do for all of us! we here stateside..are mighty greatful!

[Jewel]

I'm really sorry to hear about Dan's deployment. Many :hugs: to you.

[Cate]

From pictures I have seen on some of the milblogs, parts of Afghanistan are incredibly beautiful. I hope Dan gets to go to one of those places. Maybe some of us can come visit you while he is gone. I know I want to go to Poland & pottery shopping. You can take us to all your favorite yarn places. We could knit and laugh and have a blast. Maybe even give you some help packing up all those popcorn boxes. When does Jeremy get home? Do you know where he will be stationed next? Trying to look on the positive side. Cate

[Teresa C]

Well, you have a lot of support there, and a lot support here as well. You have many blogger friends that will lend a long distance helping hand. And when you get to NH (where I just happen to live) we'll have a big meet-up party, there is definitely something to look forward to!

[Rose]

oh Jean... I'm so sorry. I will keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers.

[yvette]

Sorry to hear your news, sending you big hugs. Take care.

[Vicki]

Okay, I was a little bit scared. I'm still a little bit scared, but I feel better knowing that you're okay with everything. Poop, anyway. Wishes for a speedy year!

[Rossana]

Argh! (anguish!) Good for you for seeing a positive lining on that cloud though. And it's perfectly ok to throw a hearty bawl session every so often. >>hugs

[Margene]

My heart was in my throat. It must be a disappointment on many levels. Life is forever throwing curve balls. We just need to learn to hit them out of the park. My best to you, Jean and a big hug.

[LisaB]

Jean - I'm sorry to hear about the news. I have so much admiration for the men and women who serve our country and for their families. I think you are amazingly strong and my prayers are with you and your family.

[Leah]

My prayers are with you, wow, a year is a long time. I am glad you will still be with a community of friends. Stay strong, it isn't easy, two preteen boys, husband far away in a dangerous place. We are all very greatful for the sacrifice you and Dan are making on our behalf. btw, when he gets to Afghanastan, I'd love to add him to the operation Gratitude list. Memorial Day weekend, 1500 volunteers packed and shipped 19,634 boxes to send overseas. A small way of showing we know and care about the sacrifices families like you make for us daily. Leah